Buying XJS

Jaguar XJS Buying Guide

  Welcome to XJS Buying Guide. Not the one you have seen on the Jaguar Forum, not the one from your grandad. A buying guide being a quintessence of reasonably foreseeable scenarios that can bend you over. A buying guide allowing to avoid epic failure in your life – with help of reasonably practicable checks prior to your planned purchase form a fellow Irish Traveller using sentence “trader” for marketing purposes. If you are not living in the UK – the idea of purchasing Jaguar XJS is probably very attractive. You may be lucky to buy excellent example for the fair price – outside of UK market, where the weather conditions are contracting its biggest flaw - British Me t al. In this guide I assume you are buying Jaguar XJS for the price balancing closely between four and five digit figure, with one exception related to "barn finds"  Enough, let’s get this done.


Things you need before going to view your dream car:

1.   LED Telescopic Inspection Mirror – don’t you dare leaving home without it


2.    LED torch – reliable x2
3.    Your best hotel-stolen towel and WD40 – may be needed to discover VIN number
4.    Vacuum Gauge (see below), T-piece and few inches of vacuum hose (3mm ID)
5.    Multimeter
6.    Syringe with approx. 1 meter of fitted tubing
7.    Rectangular, flat Neodymium magnet in heat shrink with something allowing grip/pull-off
8.    Disposable nitrile gloves (loads)
9.    Set of brand-new wipers (mandatory)

10.  Phone call to seller and your request to make sure car will be dead cold on your arrival (not warmed up for you, refuelled, other crap-talk)


Try to book a viewing for non-rainy, cloudy day after few days of rain (best scenario).


Jaguar XJS Asbestos parts

Most important rule: DON’T BUY IT if you are not desperate, not planning divorce or social downgrade. 


If you have any other non-British car option – go for it, even if it’s something exotic like Zastava, Lada, FSO cars.


You must be aware of unfortunate fact that Great Britain is full of scam and propaganda - sometimes worst that in former Easten-Block countries. Starting from horse meat in Tesco, ending on nuclear fuel from Sellafield. 

Examples? Your XJS is being sold with ASBESTOS inside, while "apparently" and as per official Jaguar statement - it's not being used in XJS model since 1980 (apart from brake pads).

Content List / Quick Links:

Chapter 1: Jaguar XJS Purchase – Idea

Self-explanatory – start from this one as most of willing-to-be XJS owners will abandon purchasing idea or end up with suicide attempt in insurance records.


Chapter 2: Jaguar XJS Purchase - Seller Profiling

This chapter will help you with assessment of the XJS seller. Believe it or not – seller can tell you more about Jaguar XJS than mechanic.


Chapter 3: Jaguar XJS Purchase - Formal Aspects

General aspects of purchase, applicable to every car, not only XJS. If you’re a knob, definitely worth reading it.


Chapter 4: Jaguar XJS Purchase - Where to look

This part relates to first impressions and will allow you to avoid wasting your time. First visual inspection – absolute “must do” during the viewing.


Chapter 5: Jaguar XJS Rust

Best friend of every Jaguar, this chapter tells you where to look and what to check – as XJS are famous inside-out rotters


Chapter 6: Jaguar XJS Test Drive

Got to the test drive stage? Turn off the radio and blower, listen to the creepy sounds and feel the Decomposition.

Chapter 1: Jaguar XJS Purchase - Idea

Be open-minded, challenge destiny, especially while reading communistic specs of the cars with socialistic background. Let’s face the facts without spitting on the mirror. When Rover (British Leyland) and Honda were collaborating in design of Rover 800 – also known as Honda Legend – Britons were much more excited about it - than in the day when Honda sold them their Crossroad platform to Rover. You don’t know what Honda Crossroad is if you are a British Citizen. This type of knowledge in UK is often rejected and dropped to the bottom of mind, pushed out by national feel of superiority, No, not the new Crossroad, the one manufactured in 90s. It was the only Honda with V8 engine that caused bloody argue between Honda’s board members that was swept under the British carpet and cleaned with wet&dry Henry vacuum cleaner. The bell is still on silent? The only Honda with 3.9 V8 engine made by Buick (oops, it would be politically inappropriate to say Buick 215cu engine, so I meant to say Rover V8):

By Riley from Christchurch, New Zealand - 1994 Honda Crossroad, CC BY 2.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=38923105

There you go. British pride. Land Rover Discovery. 


I understand your emotions. For me, this car was a main reason of migration to UK, true passion, much stronger than passion to Land Rover Defender - so fake and non-offroad... 


And then, everything collapsed. I found this. with "H" logo in place. 

Now evertyhing adds up. invisible puzzles landing next to each other to create a picture showing scene, trick and reward. 

With the example of Rover and Honda below - just imagine how indestructible this Disco could be - if manufactured in Japan...


My ultimate-forever choice of aoutomoive manufacturer, from that moment - is Honda.  
Let’s get back to Rover 800 as this will be better example. Rover 800 was made in UK since 1986. Simultaneously Honda Legend was made in UK since 1986.
Same construction, same UK workmanship and 3 day working week. Guess what happened – at the beginning Honda failed almost all Oxford-made cars during their quality control and opened production in Japan. UK made Legends were for Britons, Japan made Legend for the rest of the world. Conclusion. Honda Legend is a true legend in terms of reliability (non-Oxford made only), development and luxury. You can find Legend examples today for legendary price, especially in coupe version. Rover 800 – exactly the same car with different badges – is on the global list of World’s Worst Cars Ever Made. I know what you’re thinking, this was in the past and stays the past.

Here’s another one. During recent, free conversation with fresh 68-plate Range Rover owner I realised why this brand still exists. The owner emphasized that she knows her car is “reliable like her husband’s penis” however she can afford herself to have it in the workshop for two weeks each month – and that’s "The Social Status". Being a Patriot isn't too bad as long as you are pushing your country towards improvement, not allowing it to stay behind...

Now you’re feeling down and depressed – here’s some good news. Your Jaguar XJS is a state-of-art when compared to Rover, however you can still find sticky fingers of Leyland inside…


Chapter 2: Jaguar XJS Purchase - Seller Profiling


Still here and willing to buy XJS? Good. It means you are bit like me – poor parasite with delusion of humanity… Before closer look on XJS in your interest – look at the owner. Any missing teeth? Pictures of too many children in the wallet? Welding mask impressions on the scalp? Those are the symptoms of potential bad decisions that you will make. Let’s create two groups of potential sellers.




Group 1 – Registered Companies.


Traders.

Some of the car traders in UK are willing to put something on top of the purchase price and push the car to another owner. Most of the car traders globally are willing to buy something for £0.99 and sell it for £9999 – and they will use all the dirty tricks to achieve this. Believe me there is no better market with specific mentality and technical understanding of the buyers – than multicultural United Kingdom. If something looks shiny and has a glitter on it – or better – Union Jack, it will go like fresh rolls. Same with the cars. To simplify. Every trader buying a car in a good shape will advertise it with severely higher resell price – in consequence leading to over-the-market price for the same model purchased elsewhere. If the car is piece of junk, some traders are buying it for pennies, usually finding non-VAT and self-employed mechanics – mostly with foreign nationality and asking to do the things that most of the registered workshop would report to the constabulary or express it on the Facebook to get the publicity. THIS MAY BE APPLICABLE TO “WELL-RESPECTED” TRADERS AND THOSE LESS KNOWN – THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO RULE ON THE TRADER’S ORIGN, FAMILY TRADITIONS, OTHER HORSE-SHIT. I have seen dodgy places around London with dodgy sellers and really honest deals, same as glamourous traders with wealthy postcodes being absolute villains. Believe me, I have seen beautiful BMWs drained dry after flood, insurance-unreported damage and crash data wiped-of with use of stolen parts. So be prepared. Buying from the traders can be good, but requires bullshit-detector. If you’ll find any obvious issue with the car and the answer of the trader will be reflected with question “are you certified MOT tester to state that?” – say yes, just obtained Nominated MOT Tester for classes 4 and 7 (group B vehicles) and waiting for my certificate. You’ve also built 3 replica cars with your mother. If they will ask for more details – just ask who the hell are you to ask. One of the most common follow-up tactics to release the pressure – is the sentence “after purchase we will do MOT and if anything is wrong – it will be repaired”. Don’t believe in their MOT test made by Bob who also works for them. Don’t believe in any warranties –if you are a solicitor and you are happy to study terms and conditions of the warranty – you will know it’s an absolute joke – often followed by official decisions of the UK courts. Forget it. With extremely dodgy bangers – traders sometimes try to advertise the car a “private seller”, sometimes at random location – “let’s meet at…” then refusing to go to their home address to sign the documents. Avoid any remote location. My advice – avoid all traders without exception. Unless you’re willing to overpay or find one month old, rolled The Sun newspaper in your nearside sill few days after the purchase. Buying from car trader has no pros – unless you are buying XJS with estimated market value above £20000. Below – you are childish. “Buying from Trader is Safe” – it’s a Bullshit same in severity as giving your property to letting agent which “will take care of everything” – including your savings and rental income.



Auction Houses.
You will find your perfect deal here one day, as long as you can travel full-time through every shithole in UK and spending what’s left to find those across the Internet. Mostly cars of a dead people here...


Copart Auctions.
This is the place where most of the trader cars from 1.1 travelled from. Nothing good waits for you out there – unless you’re: extremely lucky, having your own salvage transport, able to read with understanding – especially terms and conditions related to Copart fees.  Occasionally you will find XJS on their website.




Group 2 – Private Sellers.


Investor.
Group of the sellers that invested horrendous amount of money in their XJS knowing they will never get them back and they are using their XJS to drive it to the end of the driveway to get the leaflets from letterbox. Most of them (like me) are heretics with belief in their skills and willingness to perform all the repairs by themselves. This group is having stable budget and forgiving partners. They will sell their XJS only due to no challenging achievements left with their XJS restoration project. THIS IS YOUR ULTIMATE AIM if you want to achieve best price-quality ratio.



Investor-Delusionist.
Seller as per 2.1 however busily gathering every receipt from their XJS project – truly believing they will get the entire total during potential sale of their beloved project. They know it for sure and nothing and nobody will persuade them. Normally joining the sect of heretics from 2.1 after several months of unsuccessful sale for delusional asking price. You are not young, rich, smart and famous – so avoid. If you are – look for the different project – Dassault Aviation’s Falcon 2000S seems to be more reasonable choice.

Wealthy Farmer.
Probably you’re going to see genuine “barn find” Jaguar XJS. Our farmer knew it’s there, hidden in the barn, for the last 10 years, he remembered, however now he needs to sell the barn with piece of surrounding land to the developer. Don’t expect XJS to be in good condition or looked-after. Don’t expect asking price to be cheap. They will give it to their friend for free even for the banger race or donate it for the auction – instead of selling it to you for the half of asking price. Farmers are usually good people and with clear introduction of facts you can prove that XJS restoration needs more attention and service - than rotor rake in their yard. Prove that you’ll restore it and love it. You can also try a blackmail – tell the Farmer that you will invite fellowship Travellers to settle down on his land. Tell that it will take time but - bit by bit - XJS will move out through the cracks in the wall. This scenario is illegal and risky – make sure you have at least NIJ Level IIIA approved vest on.

Poor Farmer.
Their XJS needs to go and it needs to go quick, before bailiff’s visit. Some chances for a genuine “barn find”, however started up already, ongoing renovation, no beginning and no end. They need money for something else and it needs to go. Lowest asking price and wide field for negotiation. You can find real diamonds here, cheap.

Youngster.
Usually under 21, received their XJS from relatives after they’ve passed away. They were willing to start their journey with classic cars. It’s not what they’ve expected. The amount of problems and budget exceeds their capabilities. They don’t know where the spark is coming from. THey will learn that shortly. They’re struggling with the fact that car did not start after replacing battery. If you can prove that the car is actually: not environmentally friendly, can make their twitter profile score really bad, may cumulate background radiation and bad karma – it’s yours for a quarter of the price. Or just say that the new iPhone will be released shortly.

Breaker.
If the Jag is too good to strip it down – breakers will advertise it. Those sellers know XJS inside-out, starting from engine sound while still assembled, through the calculation of workload needed to disassemble rusty crap non-destructively, ending on the in-the-crusher sounds and the art of reasonable components pricing. Good deals with those people. Most of them are technically-minded motorheads. Being a motorhead will help. Most of their cars offered for sale consist of several Jaguar models transplants, not limited to XJS model only. This shall not be considered negative – as the workmanship of genuine assembly is usually worst. Be prepared for missing elements, washers, blanking caps, covers, problems with wheel alignment.

Foreigner.
Unusual group of sellers hard to find in UK as most of foreigners appreciates reliability and clean houses - over the glitter and superglued plastic nails. There is few of them, absolutely unpredictable. There is an obvious trend in every car’s popularity. Jaguar for example it considered luxury brand in Europe, while in UK it reflects what FSO Polonez reflects in Poland, Lada Samara in Russia, TATA in India, Pyeonghwa Motors in North Korea or MG Motor in China. I remember my first amazing ride with XJ40 while owning Opel Senator able to do 140mph without an effort. Those cars were considered extremely luxury outside of UK. Foreigners from Central and Eastern Europe are usually having much better technical understanding of cars. This is not due to being smarter. Simply, “wealthy living” in those geographic areas is absolute shit and enforces their citizens to fixing what they’ve got with any resources available instead of consuming new goods like cars. Problem solving must be highly developed, same as ability to save money for trashy holidays – 5 years in advance. You can score well maintained XJS from this group of sellers or secretly bodged one – including improvised solutions like crankshaft bearings being “fixed” with use of A4 sheet of writing paper. Proceed with caution. Observe environment, follow the rule of “fuel tank status” – less petrol means higher risk of fraud. This group ca be combined with 2.1 and 2.2 above.


Jaguar “Lover”
Jaguar Lover will let you have a look at your potential purchase in front of their semi-detached house, they love Jaguars, however they usually have no clue about mechanical side and the need of regular maintenance under the bonnet. They don’t want to know. They don’t want to hear that something needs to be done - as long as it looks nice on the driveway, with moss in all less visible places. True XJS “Lover” will show you how to lift the bonnet without even one working gas strut spring designed to do so – old broomstick. Dodgy MOTs, radius arms patched with Clarke MIGs of their neighbour, fuel tank topped up to the reserve on sale, most of their XJS are probably stored on SORN. Jaguar Lover consistently follow the rule – don’t touch rusty spots until they’ll be gone with the wind blowing from the coast usually 500 yards away. When it begins to look nasty from one side tey will park other way around to hide it (sill looks nice on the driveway). Neglected bodywork, they could do something about it, even with can of Hammerite 5 years ago, but it would look nasty, non-genuine. Now the wing panels and door bottoms are gone so it’s time to sell it. Consider only genuine low mileage models, Discard the rest. If unsure – follow the look of their front garden. Wide opportunities of price negotiation. Once I went to see the XJS advertised for £3000. After 150 miles journey, few minutes after arrival the price went down to £1500 - for "fully MOT-ed example". Two days later I received a text message with the seller’s offer of £600 which was pretty attractive, however I purchased my lucky example already.


Actual XJS belonging to “JagLover” is easy to identify via nail clippings in the footwell, pictures of unknown children hidden under the dash and smell of urine from driver’s seat.



Chapter 3: Jaguar XJS Purchase - Formal Aspects


Finally, we’re here. If you skipped what’s above – it means that your common sense is fully developed and you’ve mastered non-verbal communication already…


3.1    Location.

Buy XJS ONLY at seller’s home address or trader’s registered location (don’t forget to check it twice if you don’t give a toss about everything I wrote above). Assess the property – there are two main types. Type A: your common sense tells you to wipe your shoes before going inside of the house to sign the deal. Type B: your common sense tells you to wipe your shoes before geting out. If you are living in UK, I must clarify – Type B isn’t promising. If you’re finding too many objects in front of your buyer’s property and all of those seems to be random or damaged – don’t expect anything from the XJS parked outside. This relates to both: scrap metal and garden dwarfs. Check if potentially-yours XJS has some anti-theft equipment. That will tell you a lot about the postcode of the owner. Look at the driveway – if you can find any mossy rectangular shape similar in size to Jaguar XJS – that’s regular storage location of XJS in your interest. If it’s there – the car wasn’t moving. Jags are rotting while standing still. Regarding Trade sellers – assess the same thing - if your IQ is above 52 you will be able to recognise if you are at rented premises or travellers site. Best weather for inspection: cloudy, dry, after few days of rain.


3.2    Documented history.

Don’t bother with purchasing a car check over the Internet prior to arranged viewing. You will waste plenty of money. Familiarise with it, choose the best provider and do it IF the object of your check reflects description from the advert. Go through V5 and acknowledge the number of previous buyers, anything less or equal 5 is ok. More or equal 25 may bring concerns – even if you’re ultimate loser. At least it should... Forget about any log book records confirmed with a stamp – wake up, we’re not living in 80s – you can get stamp for £3.50 including delivery. I use to know someone having full box of those, with addresses of industrial estates across the UK. When challenged, his response was simple: “fucking idiots are buying cars just because of those stamps”. He was a car trader by the way... Unless you can check stamp source or those are coming from recognised places (recognised services are having digital service traceability) – don’t be a retard and enter 21st century, even with your cheque book.


3.3    Seller’s ID .

Most of the XJS sellers are over 60, we cannot deny it. Some of them are extremely old or just passed away. Make sure that details from V5 are matched with the person in front of you, Passport is the best. If seller is unable to prove his ownership – just walk away.


3.4    Jaguar XJS Insurance quote.

Get the best one prepared in advance, prior to going for viewing. You will be too horny after your purchase and you will take anything.  Remember that some companies are working from 9:00 to 5:00 which means your purchase will get finalised next day after off-work hours. Here’s a funny thing. As you probably HAVEN’T NOTICED – Jaguar XJS without car alarm installed is cheaper to insure at some insurance providers than with factory alarm system. How that works – no idea, however if you try to adjust your quote – you will see.




Chapter 4:  Jaguar XJS Purchase - Where to look


4.1    Genuine “Barn Find” XJS.

This sub-section is prepared especially for people willing to hunt genuine “barn find”, not barn find left there 12 days ago for an ultimate loser happy to buy it as seen, with major flaws – f.eg. blown head gasket or trashed gearbox. Hopefully, life wisdom will allow you to distinguish non-runners willing-to-be “barn finds” from genuine ones. I have seen “barn find” of BMW 850 with actual busted engine, failing ECU, and non-working internals. All of those were sold by the owner and replaced with crap left in exchange. Double profit…
Every XJS stood still for a long time will have at least one piston in each brake calliper seized. Press the brake and you will need electric winch to pull it out. You must be extremely lucky if brakes in your “barn find” XJS are working fine and you must be extremely dumb to believe that you’re extremely lucky. Same with the manual XJS versions – depress the clutch and it will stay dropped to the floor. Petrol in fuel tank of every genuine “barn find” is orange and flows like a sirup (if you don’t know the appearance of fresh petrol – ask your wife for help in opening a tank of your hedge trimmer). Radiator’s fan should barely rough-spin when forced with your hand. Flywheel should have rust on the track grooves (inner part of the grooves where normally the belt is sitting), same thing applies to alternator, water pump and AC compressor (oxidation or rust in the grooves). Every coolant expansion tank should have rust inside if empty or rust with the coolant level - if still something left inside. There should be plenty of insects/vermin’s leftovers in the air filter housing – you can open it easily to check if those are undisturbed on sucked into the filter.  After many years – tyres are flat and seriously deformed with serious cracking all-over the pressure points. Any circumferential cracks and no flats may suggest that the car was fired up and taken for a ride (negotiate 50% price drop). Fresh layer of dust will be always brighter in appearance and easy to remove. Old layers are dark and difficult to brush-off. All of the bolts/nuts should be either rusty /or/ greyish in appearance with layer of rough oxidation on them (on the plated bolts). Use pocket torch. ANY FRESH MARKS on the bolts/nuts - are the sign of tampering / catastrophic failure during idiotic start-up / exchange of components.


4.2    UK Category C and D write-offs.

There is a special, sometimes ultimate bargain under one of those two letters – thanks to UK web forums, where most of the users are repeating the bullshit of other users until bullshit will transform into something called Tribe Knowledge (also known as British Standard). There are legends being spread from pecker to mouth and from mouth to other pecker, faster than COVID-19 infection. Frankly, UK category C and D write-off cars are one of them. Explanation: category D is related to cars without any structural damage, with value lower than the cost of possible repair. Category C relates to cars with light structural damage classified by insurer as repairable (however impacting structure of the vehicle). Category D was recently rebadged and is known as Category N. Same thing applies to Category C – currently named Category S.  Now, when everything becomes clear – let’s get back to your mechanical knowledge.
STRUCTURAL DAMAGE of the car in UK consist of damage made to:
-    A-post or B-post
-    Front or Rear Header Rail
-    Front or Rear Crossmember
-    Front or Rear Inner Wings
-    Sills
-    Bulkhead
-    Side Cant Rails
-    Front or Rear Chassis Leg
-    Rear wheel housing extension
Those elements are making sure that your car won’t fold-up like accordion during the crash with human puddle left inside. Structural damage is repairable BUT – we are living In United Kingdom where quality of structural repairs is not being checked. Forget about any bullshit related to recommissioning requirement of the Cat C and D vehicles, additional tests, other crap. There are NONE of those required by UK law. This may be deadly when mixed with average skills of the British workshops – thinking that tack-welding is actually only true, nationally-recognised, universal method for everything. Due to what’s above – forget about any single write-off classified as Category S (old Cat C) - unless you are professional, CSWIP 3.2 certified and willing to perform repairs personally.
Category N, also known as Category D – may be an ultimate bargain for you, especially if the seller truly believes that Tribe Knowledge mentioned above is actually true. Been there, done that. Example. My Jag came as Category D – with nearside door and front wing damage (dents). It was written-off by insurer in the times where Jaguar XJS was worth less than Ford Fiesta mk2. Former owner was using it as a donor car for another XJS so plenty of things missing. Still, 11+ years in dry barn made it shiny in comparison to the examples on the road with fully bodged MOT. Nice, “gentleman” contractor with single car transporter hired for obvious purpose was trying to outbid me on arrival – after seeing Jag’s underside. Even after I gave him actual sale price multiplied by 3. Frankly it was too late and Mr Gentleman scored few f-words and kicked off without single-penny for his attendance. Another contractor of foreign background was having a better customer service. And Category D status during HPI checks? Screw Category D – most of XJS examples on the roads, after real MOT would be classified as Category B instantly with structure disintegrated by rust…


4.3    Signs of (no)servicing.

Start from the wiper motor assembly – also known as cabin air inlet. That’s the place where most of the organic crap starts to gather moisture and starts to dissolve your favourite Jaguar model. Every owner who wants to keep XJS in good condition -cleans this area every few months. Use strong led torch to see what’s laying under metal mesh. If there is a lot of crap in there you can expect draining pipes in the engine bay to be absolutely blocked. Expect water inside (especially footwells). Test the washer spray function – it normally fails completely in the cars not in use. Look under the rear suspension. You should see grease nipples installed in the bottom section of rear hubs, also on the IRS bottom plate there are round openings exposing wishbone bearings with grease nipples. If those are missing – you will need to rebuild aforementioned components – take that for granted. Ask if the owner knows how to grease the hub bearings - “not sure” answer means those were never re-greased. Using occasion inspect the rear inboard brake discs – both, from both sides. Any corrosion on the friction surface proves that pistons in brake calliper are seized. And yes, you will have to exercise and lay flat on the ground or jack it up.
Pull out engine’s dipstick (also know as bayonet in the Europe). Assess the colour of the oil – AJ6 and AJ16 are known from keeping oil clean between 6-7.5k miles oil changes. If you have dark “diesel mud” on the dipstick – engine oil was probably replaced in the summer 96’, the engine is dying or your potential purchase has a mileage exceeding 150k which normally means its engine is... dying (don’t look at the odometer – this means nothing). Check the automatic tranny’s dipstick (you don’t need to start the car). Look at the colour and smell it. Best condition would be pink with nice fruity smell (ATF). Fair condition would be red with not so nice smell. Absolutely butchered tranny will have yellow-orange colour with spicy burnt smell. Look at the drive belts – those may be cracked and disintegrating or looks new-ish, check the tension – are those just right, wobbling loose or tightened to maximum (if too tight - add the cost of new water pump and alternator bearings to potential XJS project).If owner can live with loose drive belt giving nasty sound on cold and during the entire rainy season – just imagine what else is waiting for you.
Inspect the engine bay - any electric rat-nests around ABS, wiring looms, MAF sensor or engine itself – are suggesting highly-qualified jaguar lover making repairs to the highest standard. Inspect brake fluid reservoir – what is the colour of the fluid? I know, I know what you’re willing to say – electronic brake fluid tester is much better… Unless it’s made in China for a dollar without any calibration whatsoever. If you have one from quality manufacturer (no, not SEALY or DRAPER) – use it. If not – look at the colour – amber, clear is good. More brownish – more unacceptable condition of your brakes is. WAIT! you have nothing in ABS reservoir to start with (plastic baffle in the reservoir). SO PUMP THE BRAKE PEDAL WITH ENGINE SWITCHED OFF. Pump and it will flow up. Every XJS owner knows that Jaguar (Girling) brakes are failing badly, The failure mode of Girling brake callipers is not obvious – it’s legendary. Let me challenge this legend with the words: To all sheep-shagging XJS-owning peasants: what you don’t know is the fact that Jaguar XJS should have brake liquid changed every 2 years of 30k mile whichever comes first. When was the last time you’ve replaced yours? Girling brakes in XJS are massive, made of steel, looks exactly like it should look in the over-2tonne car, are having exact amount of pots to stop this pile of British Sheet Metal. Not like the crap installed in these days cars, proven-engineering-design term and continual improvement rubbish… Only major Girling flaw - British chrome/nickel plating on the brake pistons... This makes massive difference, like a difference between spelling  “Can’t” and “Cunt” to the female Border Force officer at London Stansted Airpor.



4.4    Technical examination.


I really doubt that any of the XJS sellers will allow you to strip it down to see what’s truly hidden inside, hence all the checks listed below – are only those non-invasive, moderately non-invasive and non-destructive. Most of them are dirty so book your manicure session in advance and leave Versace’s frock coat from Primark on the hanger.


4.4.1    Basic Checks.

In this section I assume that you have managed to complete all the basic checks – mandatory for non-wanking buyer of any car. That includes but is not limited to : central locking system (check with passenger doors manually locked), electric mirrors, windows (check both all the way to the bottom and up), blower fan, heating, air conditioning, light beams, indicators, wipers, horn, all lights including reverse and fog lamps, interior lights including switches and their backlight, speedo and rev counter, fuel gauge, pressure gauge, charging gauge, warning lights, fault codes displayed on something called “trip computer” (yes, your supercar is able to do it), locks and keys (check if all fit to one key or each one is different) etc… Only few of those are mentioned below – as requiring special attention. Find the issues, assess the workload and asking price – then negotiate.


4.4.2    Before you start it up.

Check the steering wheel – rock it lightly both ways, probably you will find a play and weird sound causing it. Stuck your head into the driver’s footwell. There should be a universal joint visible:

Jaguar XJS Upper steerting column joint

Rock it and confirm/exclude the upper steering column joint on the photo. If you'll exclude exclude it (and you probably will) – the issue lays with U-joint of lower steering column (photo below read further).


The U-joint of lower steering column it a true classic of British Automotive Industry. It is also known under different name which is I-hav-no-fokin-clue-what-to-fit-there-due-to-a-foker-who-misread-techncial-drawings-or-never-reported-a-foker-who-made-technical-drawings-incorrectly-so-I-shovelled-dis-shit-in-there-anyway-as-my-manager-said-it-will-be-ok. 

For reference purposes you may call it: 

IHNFCWTFTDTAFWMTDONRAFWMTDISISDSITAAMMSIWBO-Joint. You will go through unusual pain while trying to refurb it – as the replacement is not available worldwide (even Chinese couldn’t measure how far off-centre it is due to excessive laugh).  Photo of problematic joint below ("Leaks in Engine Bay").


Press the brake pedal as many times as you can – preferably between 20 and 850 -before going to the next point.

Brake accumulator. 

After pressing brake pedal from 20 to 850 times - turn the ignition key on, but don’t start the car yet. You will hear the sexual intercourse sound of mammal called Armadillos. The sound will last from 30 seconds to infinity, where 30 seconds is the world’s best result and infinity is often a reason for sale of beloved XJS – by Jaguar Lovers (see seller profiling above). This is the pump sound of your brake accumulator which is responsible for ABS/braking. If you can’t hear the pump whining to load up the pressure, look under the bonnet. You can't see anything like on the photo?Consider yourself lucky – unless you don’t have vacuum servo as well (it means your brakes are using only energy generated from RADON - popular in Cornwall). 


Quick cost calculation: brake accumulator assembly in unknown condition - £250, new brake accumulator sphere £250-450, new pressure switch £200-300. Poor XJS owners are unaware that similar assemblies can be adopted from other brands – f.eg. Volvo (£30 for assembly)… but we must keep it original, don’t we?

4.4.3    Starting the engine.

Time for a real mechanical test like those seen on Hollywood movies. It’s time to feel like USA is bringing democracy to the rest of the world. Same truth as your XJS condition - per advertisement. First, hit the ground and check with your palm how cold in the engine's oil sump pan. If it’s not, seller lied about leaving it dead cold for you. You should have no problem reaching the sump pan unless you are midget. Midgets are also owning and driving some XJS models, they can do more than you, for example sit comfortably on the XJS's rear passenger's sofa. If you're a midget - ask random pedestrian to do it for you (works in UK if you’re a midget) or offer a £5 for doing it (the way it goes with rest of the world). Now it’s time to lift a bonnet.

Jaguar XJS bonnet strut

Be prepared to hear “I forgot to say - struts are not working” or similar phrase. The opening operation will become a deadlift. You came to buy a Jag for £8000+, you’ve just went through quarter of UK to get here, and you have to look for a telescopic mop handle to perform vexing necropsy of your excellent-condition-for-its-age-XJS model (yes you little blunt shit from Swansea riding white Mini Cooper – I remember. Any unlucky buyer attending your address with willingness to buy that revolting XJS corpse – remembers as well). I suggest taking Vileda telescopic stick with you to avoid contamination of your soul (Vileda fits into the backpack). Unless you’re buying a corpse for the price of the scrap - think twice about buying a car from seller unwilling to lift the bonnet. Keep the bonnet open. Focus, engage the starter motor and listen to any rattling sound which may disappear after few seconds or few minutes. If rattling was present – your timing chain is running loose due to failing chain tensioner (upper) or timing chain is stretched. Streched timing chain is extremely popular – mostly due to incorrect start-up after long time not in use (see correct starting up of barn find HERE).

Charging and oil pressure gauge. 

Rev the engine to 2000 rpm. If you don’t know how to locate the relevant gauge to check it – walk away and buy yourself Mini Cooper. Observe the pressure and charging gauge. Pressure gauge should slowly go up – if not – repeat later after full engine warm-up and test drive. Still showing the same value? Not moving??? It means the pressure gauge sender is favourite cheat of every XJS owner – fixed-value Chinese sender showing only one, always “true” reading. Engine oil is probably laying flat in the sump pan and crying. Discard the purchase unless you’re buying it as a donor or price is similar to those from Poundland. Now the charging gauge – is it showing stable/still value or the indication needle is jumping? Will it drop after turning on blower fan and headlights? Indicator should be stable and drop after switching on blower fan, later lights, still the indication should be above 50% of the total gauge scale. Jumping needle suggest problems with alternator/voltage regulator, brushes or sliprings = refurbishment of alternator or fireball with you in the centre of it - is behind the corner. If the indication is too high, after test drive -warning light (battery) should kick in (over-charging protection shut-off). While you are here - check the fuel level, anything below quarter of the tank suggest that seller is really tight and able to "fix" most of the issues with duct tape. Photo with gauge levels should make nice reference during your viewing (start from cold).
Heater Matrix Vacuum Valve.
Slightly less famous than Jaguar Girling brakes – here it is, a valve in the engine bay that shuts off the coolant flow to the heater matrix when the cabin blower fan is switched on and the temperature adjuster is set to minimum. Every Jaguar XJS owner knows – it’s failing badly. Well, another challenge – as my one is working perfectly. Two words, so unknown among Jaguar owners: CORRECT COOLANT and LUBRICATION. If you will ask Jaguar owner – what is the best coolant for their car – most probable answers are “I’m buying universal in Halfords” and “water, of course”. How can you expect something to be abused, last forever while not being Toyota. What is a true British Tragedy – Jaguar Lovers, probably inspired by Jaguar Workshop Manual from 80’s – are notoriously topping up their cooling system with “Bars Seal Shit” causing disaster in the entire engine… That includes vacuum valve in the subject. Photo of device from my Jag below, working with G05 coolant and being sprayed with XCP rust inhibitor once every 6 months. No problems so far. You will find of discussions across the Internet – “what coolant should be used with AJ6 and AJ16 engines?”. Well, your cylinder head is made from aluminium. Figure it out…
Engine Check.
Obvious things first. Can you hear it running smoothly on idle, is it running silent and stable on hot, can you match the sound of it with the mileage on the clock? As the seller will never allow you to do compression checks or remove the components – here’s the magic used by your grandfather. This thing is called Vacuum Gauge and guess what – it’s been used to diagnose the condition of the engine long before the OBD2 ports were designed. The trick is – it requires common sense and something more than pressing “start” button on touch-screen device. Frankly we have a software that thinks for you, while you’re improving sweet-photos on Facebook profile. I won’t tell you how to use it – you will find plenty of tutorials across the Internet. To simplify – here’s short test video of my engine attached. Current mileage 60k. Get similar reaction/values/jumps/drops and you will confirm excellent condition of your potential purchase. Read the tutorials how to use vacuum gauge first. Study it. There is also a place to connect it on AJ6 3.6 engine (probably on AJ16 as well). It is worth to buy additional T-piece and few inches of extra vacuum hose to allow installation on every vacuum line outlet.
Running sound.
Assess the sound coming from under the rocker cover – camshafts of AJ6 / AJ16 engines are really smooth – you should hear only injectors. Speaking of injectors – any non-regular, non-constant “ticking” sound suggest that at least one injector is dead (refer to video above).
Idle speed should be something between 600-800rpm on hot.  Stable higher revs suggest insufficient vacuum/inlet manifold leak or MAF sensor / MAF sensor wiring failure. Sometimes, "skilled" Jaguar Lover or KwikFit technician can play with the idle adjustment screw locatd below Idle Air Control Valve. If you’re examining version with trip computer – you should have fault codes displayed or at least logged to your calculator-look device. This is a simple device - don't expect it to give you any values. It calculates the fault codes based on single O-1 parameter. There is 99.9% chance that none of the pre-programmed fault codes will ever pop-up, even after death of the engine.

Fault Codes.
During your test ride your trip computer can start to blink with "FUEL" and "FAIL" alternately. To recall  exact fault code or previous one (if any) – you will need to follow specified procedure:

For AJ6 3.6 engine (ECU type Lucas 9CU):
1.    After your 100mile test ride – switch the ignition off
2.    Wait 10 seconds and switch ignition on again – don’t start the engine or you will erase all of potential fails with starter motor sound.
3.    Your Casio-like trip computer should display fault codes – if any. Don’t expect it to be very sophisticated, better this than nothing:
FF 1 – Crankshaft Positioning Sensor signal no signal / signal error
FF 2 – MAF Sensor no signal / signal error
FF 3 – Coolant Temperature Sensor - no signal / signal error
FF 4 – Lambda Sensor – no signal / signal error
FF 5 – MAF sensor showing HIGH Value (high air flow) with Throttle Potentiometer showing LOW (throttle position read: closed)– contradiction (usually after potentiometer adjustment made by tosser or intentional corpse necromancy – to allow engine start-up)
FF 6 - MAF sensor showing LOW Value (low air flow) with Throttle Potentiometer showing HIGH (throttle position read: open) – contradiction (usually after potentiometer adjustment made by tosser or intentional corpse necromancy – to allow engine start-up)
FF 7 – Idle Control Valve / Idle circuit – no signal / signal error
For AJ16 4.0 engine (ECU type Lucas 15CU) – please refer to THIS link.

If your trip computer is somehow "not working" - treat it as intentional scam.  Trip computer mounted in XJS is based on old fashion design - I haven't seen any of those broken.
Jaguar AJ16 Fault Codes

Fuel smell in Engine Bay.

There should be ABSOLUTELY NO PETROL smell under the bonnet – while running or stopped. Jaguar engineers effectively implemented fuel smell in the boot and that’s the only place allowed. If you can smell it in the engine bay – the source of any petrol smell: fuel rail with injectors or EFI hoses (feed and return) or leaking manifold gasket (most common). Check fuel rail and hoses with your nose or refer to XJS ToolBox section where you will find best invested £20 ever – “Combustible Gas Detector” also known as “Halogen Leak Detector”. Fuel leak can quickly change your investment into Fireball. What is more terrifying and probably passed in European Union without any “veto” – is the bioethanol addition to the regular fuel. It’s one of the scams that proves the concept of spinning the economy for corporations. Why? Bioethanol dissolves fuel hoses, has a negative effect on entire engine – especiallly affects the cars made to 1998 due to different seals/materials used. Jaguar will even rust quicker while topped up with this shit. Effect on environmental impact – none. Effect on MOT-fails, scrapped/burned down cars and increase in selling new ones – MASSIVE. Some of the UK readers will probably ask - ”why someone should do such a horrible thing intentionally?” For MONEY... Most of premium fuels on the market have less of bio-shit mixed in. The fuel used in your XJS has a severe effect on potential leaks in multiple places. Commonly failing/cracking/leaking components shown on the photo.

Leaks in Engine Bay.

Oil leaks are easy to spot, coolant leaks not necessarily. Check the area under the inlet manifold, right below the oil filter – there are two pipes coming out from the filter housing – usually with a pond of oil below. You may find the oil leak in the area where the dipstick tube enters the engine block – easy fix. Check the steering rack pinion – the one below IHNFCWTFTDTAFWMTDONRAFWMTDISISDSITAAMMSIWBO-Joint mentioned above (as per photo). The seal below the metal disc washer is often leaking due to excessive heat. Check the high-pressure power steering hose right next to it (also on the photo) – this part is really difficult to get - it can be remade (not in stock/discontinued). Look behind the 6th cylinder (the one closest to the windscreen, again – leave XJS purchase idea if you weren’t aware already). There are two moon-seals under the rocker cover – notoriously leaking oil as most of the XJS owners or simple mechanics never read the service bulletins from Jaguar and are fitting those without proper silicone seal (easy fix). Leaks form those seals can simulate leak from Bell Housing – to simplify, either: the leak from output shaft seal of the engine (rear main seal) or from your transmission. Transmission oil is pink or brown, smells fruity. Engine oil may be anything between clear liquid and black tar – so you can distinguish…Leaks form the engine are common, leaks from automatic transmission rare. Real leak from bell housing generally directs the fate of any XJS banger towards the breaker yard, there is a big area to negotiate the purchase price. Look under the car, Bell housing is clearly visible and has a vent at the bottom, now you can use your LED telescope mirror or mobile phone camera to look inside and see if this is simulated or true. THIS CHECK SHOULD NOT BE SKIPPED. 


Go back to the engine bay. Any leaks from top cover are easy fix that can be made in 30minutes, including coffee and two cigarettes. Inspect the front of the engine, flywheel and CAM cover. Any leaks from here are difficult to fix as often must be made twice. Those may also suggest recent “repair” that must be made second time… Go in front of the car and through the chrome grille inspect the oil cooler. Any leaks are expensive as you will be forced to change oil cooler and install custom hoses as genuine piping can be unscrewed only with use of angle grinder. Don’t expect the cooler to be fixed to the chassis of XJS. There are rubber-to-metal mounts bolting the oil cooler in four places. Those will be disintegrated – and holding oil cooler only with the force of gravity
Jaguar AJ6 3.6 Distributor Cap

Open two clips and remove distributor cap – don’t bother asking the owner for permission, you’re not destroying anything. Inspect the timing chain tensioner (photo attached) for any leaks or signs of tampering. If there are any fresh spanner marks of the tensioner's bolts - interrogate the seller, ask tricky questions. Remove rotor arm, check is there any mud inside at the bottom, or maybe fresh oil, or maybe it’s dry. Few drops of oil are ok. Mud is bad. Dip your finger in it and smear – you are looking for any metal swarf that will evidence excessive wear of components or even grinding. If inside is perfectly dry - grab the rotor shank (not rotor arm) and check if it wobbles. Wobbling is bad and may suggest that distributor survived something terrible in the past (lack of lubrication or it was seized). 


Distributor - if  originally fitted since new - is a fantastic thing that can easily indicate the true mileage of the engine or its poor condition (play on distributor is normally related to wear of other moving parts inside of the engine…) Check distributor cap and condition of contact points inside. It’s a good sign if seller replaced it recently.
Coolant System Check.
Remember that coolant dries out and usually creates white stains, powder or even swarf in the leak area. Check the radiator’s expansion tank (most rusty, rectangular object in the engine bay). Ask the seller why he’s running it on water and let the seller prove that he/she isn’t. If the seller knows the type of coolant and last change details – it’s a good sign, as long as the coolant doesn’t look like actual water (discard the car immediately – see Seller Profiling/Jaguar Lover). Coolant must be clear and transparent. If it’s not – expect leaks and the seller who topped it up with “Bars Seal” or other shit. Expect problems with heater matrix, heater’s vacuum valve, water pump hot-spots in the cylinder head, seized thermostat problems with gravity-bleeding etc. Inspect the radiator as far as possible. Look for corrosion, Any discolorations on radiator’s matrix suggest leaks (especially in connection with muddy coolant), Check the metal bleed pipe above the radiator’s fan (usually snaps in the T-piece area, also known as "shitty pipe"). Check water pump below the pulley any droplets here are confirmed leaks. Water pumps are rotating – hence pump pulley will show no sign of leak, everything else around the pulley (perpendicular to the spinning axis) will be sprayed (white dried-out spots). Water pumps will often leak on cold engine only, hence you need to make sure that generous seller haven’t “warmed it up for you”. Check if heater matrix valve is moving – ask seller to start the car, switch on the blower fan(s) pull the temperature control spindle to switch it to manual mode and turn it from cold to hot – with your nose observing shank bracket moving up and down under the vacuum bubble (photos above already).  Check personally if changes make any difference to air temperature blowing inside of the cabin. Inspect the radiator fan’s viscous clutch. AJ6 / AJ16 engines are truly difficult to overheat, unless your fan is not spinning. Move the fan with engine off on cold – you should feel some resistance. Shut down fully warmed up engine – you should feel more resistance when turning (if you’re brave enough – you can try to stop it with screwdriver or shuriken – if seller allows). Check the clutch’s main bearing (where the shaft enters the housing. Any reddish dust or oily areas suggest that the clutch is gone, long gone. CHECK THE FAN FOR CRACKS - you may look nice wth the blade sticking out from the back of your head, however your XJS will need new radiator if the centifugal force will change your fan into confetti.
Jaguar XJS Inertia Switch

Inertia switch. 

Start the engine, pull up the shank until red part will become visible. The engine should stop immediately – this is a normal function - not what you’re looking for.  With inertia switch engaged and engine on stop – check if every electrical device is still working: that includes all window switches, electric mirrors, blower fan, gauges, interior and head lights, trip computer, radio (if any). 


You are looking for signs of rat nest under the cockpit, fiddling with genuine installation, taking shortcuts to make something work again. Usually inertia switch is being used by “skilled" electricians as a source of stock Jaguar wiring. Usually if not every time in UK– alarm devices are being installed with use of the inertia cu-out as  blocking function of "security device"… Speaking of car alarms...
Jaguar XJS Car Alarm.
You can expect each Jaguar XJS to have factory or aftermarket car alarm installed. As mentioned earlier – somehow models without any alarm device seems to be cheaper to insure. I assume that insurer have claims where alarm caused electrical fires in the past due to excellent workmanship related to re-wiring everything to fit the loudly screaming box. Jaguar XJS can be started effortlessly with steering wheel lock snapped. Best car ever to train hotwiring, believe me. That’s not a problem. True problem happens when “aftermarket alarm will stop working correctly or won’t work at all. If you’re buying XJS with any motion sensors visible/installed – ask seller for alarm remote and supporting documentation – remote is recognised minimum. It would be advantageous to know at which the alarm box is actually installed as this may save some time if the damn thins will kick the bucket or worst – won’t let your neighbours sleep at night. Check if it is functioning correctly, arm, disarm, repeat press twice, leave one door locked manually to see how it will react with attempt of locking.

Jaguar XJS Brakes.
Start from most obvious thing – handbrake. If you’re buying XJS with automatic transmission (99% cars on the marker) – checks are simple. What is most twisted and mental – is the XJS owner approach to handbrake issues. Great Britain’s XJS Tribe will say. “Those weren’t working from new”, “this is not important”, “XJS handbrake is total rubbish, “each XJS has no handbrake”… You will hear loads of this during your viewings. Don’t believe in this shit. It is nothing else than absolute lack of skills or knowledge. Every wanker giving you this type of statement thinks that XJS handbrake is similar in construction to their bicycle’s V-brakes, while under the metal cover of each handbrake’s arm lays fully adjustable mechanism. Always forgotten, always not serviced, always not lubricated and preserved. That makes it always completely seized by rust. Every workshop I have seen so far – including one specialised in classic cars was unable to spot this…
Start your test from engaging the Drive on level surface, when the car starts to roll as far as it can on idle - lift the handbrake. Car should stop within meter or two. You should feel that it actually brakes with handbrake engaged – NOT slows down. Possible outcome:
-car actually brakes – big chance that the whole rear inboard brakes are actually in good condition.
- car only slows down – expect entire rear brakes to barely work
- no reaction – your handbrake’s pads were burned away/fallen off with the end of 90’s -OR- handbrake’s linkage is disconnected/snapped.
- car is speeding up – car was recently repaired by speedboat workshop technician from Portsmouth.

Check the Brake Accumulator’s charging time (instruction above already). After Armadillos will go quiet – depress the pedal several times with light force, until you will hear it back again topping up the pressure. If the pump goes back with each pedal stroke – brake accumulator or pressure switch is dead. 2 pedal strokes -your brake accumulator is on the edge of surrendering. That’s British Standard for roadworthy Jaguars. 3 and above will make you extremely lucky assuming that car in your interest brakes well (if not – pressure switch may be activated too low).
There is another check of brake accumulator – completely unknown and requiring high level of mathematic calculations that can be accomplished only by every child in UK after finishing Primary School. Brake accumulator volumetric check, so the difference in capacity of brake/ABS reservoir – between fully loaded and with fully unloaded accumulator sphere. I know what you’re thinking… How to assess how much liquid should go in there… Answer - you can get reference data form accumulator sphere sellers/manufacturers – just pick one similar in size and pressure. Yes! What a wonderful idea! Why you haven’t heard about it on Jaguar Forums before???

Now it’s time to test 12 brake pots on board of your XJS pride. Start with selecting drive on levelled road. Test the same way while moving on idle, press the brake pedal with different force to assess reaction of the brakes. Press the pedal hardest you can. If it drops to the floor – discard the car. Now, press the pedal hardest you can and hold, while releasing look for the signs of brake binding (if car doesn’t move on idle and Drive selected - after braking). Brake binding means corroded brake piston(s). Now it’s time for road braking. Go outside, have a look at the front brake discs – those should have full face equally shining. Practically you can check only the outer side of each disc. Look under the rear of the car. You should able to see both sides of each inboard brake disc with a little of exercise. Factory mounted discs are having a ring around its circumference. Assess how much life is left in your rear discs. Replacement is a big task and should be performed by the owner only. Giving it to any workshop is equal with saying goodbye to factory set geometry of IRS. Accelerate to 60mph and brake hard. If your XJS is equipped with ABS system, it is necessary to trigger it, several times, no exceptions. Assess if it brakes or only slows down, is it dragging the mass to the one side, I can feel massive stopping force in my XJS, where the brakes were overhauled 6 years ago. Technically, you should feel it too.

To test rear inboard brakes – find some space behind, on quiet road or car park. Switch to reverse. Press the accelerator pedal to the floor until your car will speed up and catch stable revs somewhere around 3500rpm, then brake hard. I mean hard. Until full stop with squeaking sound. Keep the brake pressed and select Park on your tranny. Get out and see which wheels made a nice rubber marks on the road, compare the length if unsure. Four marks is a big success, but probably you will get only two corresponding with front wheels.

Inspect the alloys and road below them - for any wet spots/drips (brake liquid). Don’t bother with checking the condition of brake hoses, unless he owner states those were replaced recently. Flexible brake hoses in each XJS must be changed every 4 years – in theory, according to Jaguar Workshop Manual. Practically, those are probably over 20 – so put that on the Straight-After-Buy To-Do list. All-inclusive cost of replacing those by yourself – approx. £100.

Chapter 5: Jaguar XJS Rust

Common rusty areas received a separate chapter due to international fame.

I can explain inaccurate wording selection above - with limited knowledge of English language and being primitive. I know… The word “rusty” shall not be used in reference to XJS model. However, due to controversy and visitors with nationalism-related background let’s use the word “rusty” instead of “fucking absolutely rotten shit from Coventry”.

Probably you’re expecting that I’ll indicate where you should look and what to check. Nope. I can only highlight the rusty points taken as granted.
Jaguar XJS cars are equipped with unusual feature as a standard: internal explosion of rust travelling towards outer layers, factory fitted. It’s not a regular rust, it’s tricky, British rust grown on British sheet metal. But don’t worry – it could be worst. But only a bit worst. If you ever watched Polish cars rusting-off 1grain of metal during the length of cigarette, you’ll get it… Let’s get back to the subject, important things first:

Everything smeared up with underseal – means NO GOOD, especially if it looks fresh. Ask the seller when the coating was applied – if specific date will be provided – as for detailed photos with documented pre-coating condition. If none – walk away or ask for 50% price drop (treat it as a rot box). If photos are available, corresponding with the actual car – ask for the method of application (stripped or re-coated), re-coating is usually done incorrectly and will become a reason of corrosion (becomes water/moisture trap). Same with the paint – dark will cover rust, light paint will let the owner know that something is happening under it (yellow/orange staining). I use silver colour and it works perfectly, just don’t expect to find it under any other XJS…

Inverse Proportionality
There is one simple rule applicable to XJS inspection – it is called Inverse Proportionality.  Your true soon-to-be love have plenty of shiny elements. First group of those are chrome plated, second and much better group – elements made of mirror-polished stainless steel (good work by the way). You must apply inverse proportionality to both groups:  shinier the element is = less metal behind it.

5.1.    Start from XJS pride - front and rear bumpers.

Just hit the ground and look what’s waiting for you inside. Oh no! Where is your smile now?, where's your self-confidence?? Looking under the bumper may be accompanied by intellectual sentence thrown by the seller. My favourite “Seriously? Nobody looks in there!” (UK, London, native seller). Usually – rear bumper is the worst nightmare – even for breakers. There are 3 bolts on each side of the rear bumper – those will come off only with use of angle grinder, you have a choice, destroy the panels or destroy the bumper.

5.2.    While you’re on the ground already… XJS boot inspection

Rear - have a look at the boot floor and areas over the mufflers. If the bottom is smeared with underseal - what’s hidden under the sticky crap - looks probably the same as the most corroded muffler. Check if all blanking caps are installed. You may find that all blanking caps are actually missing – that indicates fuel line/tank leak or waterfall inside during the rainy days. You can replace the tank and hoses (highly recommended after purchase anyway), however you won’t weld it.  In front – check the coil spring pans for any excessive corrosion. Usually rotten – spring pans can release the springs in the way well know to US automotive. My photos are lacking all the plastic rubbish also named by Jaguar as “spoilers”. There is a lower front panel with design of water rail that has no drain (usually rotten) those panels are still available (£100 bare).

5.3.  Critical check, not easy to perform –XJS lower radiator beam.

Usually rotten, difficult to purchase or salvage (even from breakers). There are two bottom brackets attached to it. Aforementioned brackets were mounted with self-tapping screws in Coventry, so after test drive those were falling away leaving 4 holes for water ingestion. As per statements given by former Jaguar dealership employee – there was at least one scrap collector full-time employed by council to salvage those deadly brackets from the roads.


Using occasion that you're already in bent-over position - check reflectors in your headlamps! Those are usually gone and your nice reflecting surface is changed into brownish poop.  Price of the good headlamp varies, usually £5, but there are idiots paying £300 for it... Just try to find it during COVID19...
5.4.    XJS Front and rear wings.
That’s actually international standard, however apart from the arch over the wheel – your main rot area lays inside of the lowest section of your wing panel. Each XJS left on the road have had this area repaired (weld-in repair patch) or will need one. Even the collectable examples, no exceptions. There is also a bonus – coolant catch tank place on the UK offside which is useless in most 3.6 versions. It was designed to stand there, with all the mud and moisture trapped under it (get rid of it straight after XJS purchase). Each wing panel goes under the headlamp where rust also develops – nice pitting below the headlamps will show you the way.

5.5.  XJS  Sills Inspection.

Great unknown here, best advice prior to purchase – pray. Apart from prayers, definite, close inspection of the rear control arm and jacking points. Long, horizontal “feathered” or light in appearance discolorations suggest rotting from inside (water gets in via front/rear closing wall near the wheels or through any rotten place along the length). Suggest yourself with overall condition. This area should be free from arty-bullshit-underseal. If someone applied underseal on the parts designed to rot from inside - expect deception. Inspect the bottom part of the sills along the length – with bright LED torch. You should be able to trace rotten points via discoloration on the underseal – unless it’s 2 days old… Usually, most rotting places are closest to the front and rear wheels.

Look for the signs of weld repairs. In UK it's extremely easy to locate such -as the most advanced welding skills are reflected in spot/tack welding which is considered as national standard. Request of continuous bead can make you look fussy. It may have something in common with welding courses/examination being done online via Internet (hey, I’ve got UK National Level 2 in Welding as well!)

5.6.    XJS Rust under Driver and Passenger Seat Mounts.

Another potential rust places that should be really on top of this list of checks – are the anchor points of driver and passenger seats in your XJS tin dolly. Obviously, passenger seat doesn’t matter, in the same time It seems quite beneficial to have your one firmly attached to something-ish. Just try to throw an egg right into your XJS’s windscreen, you’ll get the physics…


In most examples, you will find decent inspection loft in your The-Jag XJS. In the early 70’s - single year on the road was allowing owner to watch the driveway while raising the rear footwell’s carpet. In later manufacturing years of XJS platform, after someone noticed that part-time postman with welder is a bad connection – additional masking plate was added from the bottom to allow MOT pass, globally. You can see it from inside, you can’t see it from outside.


5.7. XJS Rear Quarter Glass Nijna-Rust.

It’s legendary, it hides in the shadows, it has entire article related to it. Something that doesn’t exist until your window falls out. Take a closer look at the bottom section of the seal, any discoloration suggests rotten-though metal underneath. Same as the damp inside…

    • Inspect the bottoms of the seals from both near and offside. Closely. If you can't do it like a majority of XJS owners – ask your grandchildren to help you. Any discoloration or bubbles in this area should be treated as confirmed rot-through places under the seal. Guaranteed. There are £5 worth mobile phone disassembly kits with silicone guitar pick will allow you to pry the bottom lip of the seal up - without any damage.

    Chapter 6: Jaguar XJS Test Drive

    After all checks above – you’re finally here, an ultimate Jaguar Xjs The-Jag drive. I’ve intentionally placed this chapter in the end, just in case if you’ll get horny about all the bullshit TV series and Simon Templar. Everyone gets excited during the test drive with almost-purchased, long-awaited car. In this case – your long-awaited tin can must be examined well prior to even thinking of starting the engine and bursting into flames with it.

    Let’s make things extra-compact here. Your XJS should ride nice and lean, slice the road silently. That obviously will change with the mileage on the clock, but no bullshit with age-justification is allowed from the present owner. Some noises may be tracked directly to issues easy to rectify, other ones will show – that you’re buying a corpse from tight-pocket necromancer.

    6.1. Jaguar XJS Final Drive Noise


    Rear differ issues in XJS platform are being diagnosed in the same way as with every other RWD car, unfortunately I won’t be able to teach you how to recognise dying differ, go and look over the Youtube, then come back to read the rest below. XJS differ should last at least 120k miles with automatic transmission and AJ6 engine. Less than 100k miles with v12. Both are estimates with assumption that oil change is carried out as required. LSD additive will usually shorten life of the final drive by few percent. In short:

    -       Whining noise: gears worn or low oil level. You will be most unlucky when taking damaged automatic transmission for worn final drive. Can be distinguished while riding down the hill while accelerating and braking with engine in manual (in auto drop to position 3). If during mentioned earlier inspection you have noticed that differ and IRS is covered in fresh oil – probably differ is grinding gears on every 5th day of the week.

    -       Rumbling sound: if you’re hearing something similar to wheel bearing noise coming from under the rear sofa, it’s constant, not disappearing or getting louder when turning – probably you will need to invest in full rebuild sooner than you expect.

    -       Clanking and shaking when turning: this thing is a no-go. If connected with unevenly worn outer thread/side wall of the tyres – probably you’ll need a replacement unit instead of recon service. This can be mistaken with worn U-joints on the prop shaft / drive shaft. U-joint more likely will give a clank and squeaks with a lower speeds/reoccurring with similar revs/speed. Speaking of a..

    -       Universal joints: really simple thing beyond your sight and out of reach for inspection - in the time of purchase. Ancient people invented a wheel and U-joint few days later. It looks like a cross or “x”. The difference between both versions is usually 45 degrees. Can give distinguished clank with automatic tranny, same as damaged automatic tranny. Don’t expect to get worn U-joints in the XJS under 80k miles. All the noises should increase with the road speed.


    6.2 Jaguar XJS Gearbox Noises


    You have two options here – either you’re buying XJS with most common automatic transmission or you “like to paddle” and want the car to me more “sporty”. You are not even close to awareness how wrong you may be with your choice.

    6.2.1 Manual gearbox Getrag 265 5-speed


    Manual gearboxes are considered cheap, simple and effective. That’s actually true – unless we’re considering a purchase of any gearbox without spare parts availability – globally. That’s your XJS manual gearbox. Some people love manuals – saying they love to “paddle” during the ride. I believe – It’s just a muscle memory effect, obtained after days-long wanking. It’s like watching the B/W TV when Full-HD is already available. I must admit, manual gearboxes will serve every car, with every engine version – even the weakest. Automatic transmissions are becoming acceptable over 300Nm/200hp, below that you will ride a donkey. Getrag 265 is lightweight and originating from BMW, strong and reliable with only two problems in design – typical for every manual gearbox: synchronisers and lay-shaft bearing dying quickly (with bearing examples – dying suddenly - with fireworks and forever…). These gearboxes are expensive, rare and hard to rebuild, with custom machining usually involved. It’s a good choice if you’re really gentle with shifting and planning to use your XJS as a happy wagon, without delusion of having “sport car” similar to delusion of every MG owner.


    Diagnosis:

    Listen to the sound coming from the tunnel/below gearstick. During the ride check the quality of gear change across the range. Put the hand on the gearstick and accelerate/decelerate – any excessive vibrations may suggest internal problem. Any whining / jerks may suggest:

    - worn/dying transmission – if mileage is high – OR- mileage is low but not documented

    - abused transmission – if the mileage is low and fully documented.

    6.2.2 Automatic gearbox ZF 4HP22 / ZF 4HP24


    ZF designed this jewel with old-school approach to engineering and proven reliability. 4HP22s were used by BMW, Porsche, Volvo and Land Rover and primarily – were fully hydraulic, without even one electric wire going into the housing. It’s not a typical automatic transmission that fails and stops, these trannies, will be failing and you won’t be able to notice it for the next 60k miles. Most of the cars on the road are still running – even with internals chewed, minced and transformed into the ATF slurry – which takes over the role of ATF fluid (applicable only to hydraulic valve block versions). This was quickly rectified by ZF by implementation of electronics/solenoids into the valve bodies and introduction of “improved” 4HP24 version of the same tranny. To clarify suitability – same transmissions were used in Land Rovers - many, many years after XJS disappeared from production lines. Personally, I believe that every XJS owner should have one spare gearbox in their lounge – assembly and disassembly is a pure joy, without any sophisticated equipment. Good for keeping your brain functioning. It has 7 clutch packs (actually 6 but one is double). Two main issues were revealed over the years.

    First Problem – leakage of ATF fluid via input shaft seals directly to clutch pack “A” – causing clutch A working in Neutral (pulling) or worse – working in Parked (unnoticed). That burns the clutch discs and introduces lots of debris into the ATF fluid, in consequence destroying it. That however, usually happened in boy racer’s cars and in off-road Land Rovers. I haven’t heard about single occurrence of this issue in XJS platform. If you’re not planning to test your converter’s stall speed on every green light – forget about this one.

    Second Problem – every 4HP version with electronic valve body – was experiencing issues with rough shifting – thanks to pressure regulating solenoid – installed without any filter/strainer on the inlet. This however is an easy fix and can be done from under the car, with minimum tools/disassembly required.

    The Root Cause of both problems originates from W.A.N.K.E.R. control unit installed on the XJS driver’s seat and referenced on the ownership document. This system fails to change ATF frequently causing issues mentioned above.


    Diagnosis:

    - transmission’s dipstick is and your senses will guide you. The fluid on the end of the stick should be clear, red/pink in colour, without any burnt smell. If you’re willing to fully engage your senses – taste one drop of it, stick it into your ear and listen what it wants to say. If it’s dark and smelly – expect the rest of XJS in similar condition (

    - rough shifting, chaotic downshifts, dropping out from lockup (simplified: top gear let’s say) on the 4HP24 (facelift models with AJ16 engine) is more likely caused by pressure regulating solenoid with let’s say 90% certainty. Remember – this one may be classified as an easy fix.

    - knocks coming from below of the gearstick - when changing between D and R with brake pedal on. That’s common with these trannies and acceptable to a certain level. Relates to clutch E cylinder damage, extremely popular with 4HP22/24 gearboxes. May be mistaken with worn U-joints. Involves full gearbox strip down so avoid if any momentary whining/plinking noise will accompany what’s above.

    - shuddering, vibrations during acceleration – simply, you’re torque converter is dead.

    - whining sound all the way – low fluid level, pump on the way out or pressure regulating solenoid malfunctioning – if connected with rough shifting

    - gear noise – planetary gears worn, normal thing at high mileage, won’t cause any issues.

    - during the test drive – release the accelerator pedal on various gears, use 3 and 2 positions - you should feel light engine braking – if not – at least one of sprags is damaged (don’t buy, unless for the price without gearbox.

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